Maintaining a Calm Presence

At a recent week-long Pentera Planned Giving Seminar, participants learned about charitable annuities, remainder trusts, and other necessary tools of the trade. On the last day, one of the speakers - with over 30 years in the industry -  Peter J. Ticconi, spoke about the “Bowen theory,” a psychology term for maintaining a calm presence. What does that have to do with charitable planned giving? Apparently quite a bit!

The Bowen theory essentially lays out the emotional framework of the family unit and the significance of maintaining calm in the midst of anxiety (whether in the family, workplace environment, or other closely associated group). The premise is that if one person stays composed, his or her calming presence can influence the entire system in a positive way.

How does this theory apply to planned giving? It’s important to keep in mind that many planned-giving decisions and issues revolve around death - and death is often a hot-button emotional issue! Such discussions may spark strong feelings of anxiety among relatives, spouses, or children of the donor. A donor may also feel anxiety about a gift. For example, if a donor makes a charitable gift of his or her family home, it may bring up intense feelings of loss and sadness—even if the donor can live in the home for the remainder of his or her life.

Understanding the emotional components of planned giving and learning to navigate calmly through turbulence will undoubtedly serve your organization. Such skills help you better achieve your planned-giving goals. A calm presence goes a long way. Try practicing it yourself and see what happens!